Some days I think why even bother we're all going to die someday anyway! At my age one would think I've got it all figured out. Life is easy. I'm living on easy street. Yes things are better now that I am older. I've a nice career, two sons who are adults and are beginning their lives, an awesome soul-mate (Whom I patiently waited for), both my parents are still living. I have furry children whom I love dearly, I've a home, a car, food, clothing, etc. So what's the problem?
Well ever now and then something comes along to upset the apple cart! And I freak out for a bit. After all these years and after all the bad things that have happened in my life I STILL FREAK OUT! WHY???? Shouldn't I be use to this by now? I know life is not perfect, it's never going to be perfect so why sweat the small stuff? Go with the flow, enjoy each day whether good or bad!
Easier said than done. Now I don't like to think I am high strung, I have mellowed out a bit thru the years, however I still tend to let things bother me and then I get upset, nervous, and angry. Does this help my situation? No, and I know this! Even after all these years of reading self-help books, meditations, interventions, therapy, yadda yadda yadda-I still have my moments where I think "THIS IS IT! I'M REALLY GOING TO LOSE IT THIS TIME." Then the waters calm and I am again sailing down my path with the sun shining on my face!If truth be told I think I've done quite well for myself after all these years. There were many obstacles placed in front of me and I managed to keep plugging along. It's not often that I toot my own horn but I have to say in all honesty I am an empowered woman. I am proud of that. I have worked damn hard for what I have. I have raised two lovely sons, paid a mortgage on my house for over 20 years, stayed with my job for 25 years. Did I take risks? No I played it safe. I wanted my kids to have some stability. Life was difficult and money was tight and at times my health suffered and there were many times I just wanted to runaway from it all, but I made it through!
My first risk I took didn't come until I was 45 and that was a million to one shot. (Having my current spouse move in with me) The odds were in my favor and I've never regretted a moment these past two years. In fact we plan to make it official in December. (Is it wrong for me to thank God everyday that his ex was a complete c**t?)
Speaking of Ex's...don't you just hate it when your significant other's ex won't leave you alone? I knew going into this relationship I would have to deal with a scorned ex-wife for a little while. Fast forward to two years later and this woman is still making trouble for us! We have gone through a huge custody/visitation battle that should have never happened. (His daughter is 16 years old) The magistrate, GAL and anyone else in the court system (Will not divulge the city but it is located in North west Ohio) were openly hostile to us and we basically never got our day in court. Protective orders, emergency hearings, bogus kidnapping and death threats, you name it this loopy chick put it on us. The sad thing is his daughter is stuck in the middle. His visitation was 2 twice a month on Saturday for a period of 4 hours and we were required to make the trip from Indiana to Ohio. (How lame is that?)We were blocked from seeing her every time we turned around. The same excuses always...."We're busy, we can't, we're out of town that weekend." I do believe there is a place reserved in hell for Women like this!
I have stayed silent for too long. I've kept myself out of the whole mess simply because the case was ongoing and I feared anything I said or did would be held against me. The court case is finished, we are done, we got nothing and now we wait for 1 1/2 years until daughter becomes 18 and then she can choose if she wishes to visit us. In the meantime I plan to proclaim to all of the world just what a piece of crap this woman is. She has literally told everyone who will listen to her that we were the evil ones, that I stole her husband and that he and I deserve to be cursed for the rest of our lives. (The truth was I stole no one, we were longtime friends and he was already out the door by the time romantic feelings arrived) But hey if she wants to believe that, I am all for it! You practically gave him to me on a silver platter. How does it feel to be so unlovable and vile that he had to devise an escape plan?
Ever wonder how these type of people make it so far in life? There is no doubt in my mind she is a sociopath or certifiably insane. You that are reading this are asking yourselves "Am I bitter?" Yes I am bitter, this person should have moved on at least 1 year ago and she most certainly should not be keeping my husband from seeing his child whenever he wants.
I always allowed my sons to visit their father anytime he or they wanted. He wasn't a very nice man and we had many problems in our marriage but I set my feelings aside. My ex however chose to see my boys as little as possible (Which made me sad for them)
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